There’s No Obligation To Stay In An Unhappy Relationship
Relationships are difficult. Two people have to learn to be vulnerable with each other and at the same time have to also accept that sometimes they’re going to get hurt and they’ll have to forgive that. Relationships aren’t made any easier by the fact that humans are very good at lying to themselves about what’s going on.
This is why so many people wind up staying in a relationship that makes them unhappy. They come up with a dozen and a half reasons why it really makes sense to be with their partner. They come up with any number of reasons why they really are happy, why their relationship really is working. Yet the fact remains, they’re not happy, and it’s obvious to those around them.
This is a difficult position to be in, because sometimes there really are reasons to avoid breaking up. If you’ve moved in with your partner, you may have possessions and finances tied up together. That makes it especially difficult to untangle yourself from the relationship. It’s possible you even have children together and so you’ll have to deal with your partner whether you break up or not. In that situation, you may tell yourself that it doesn’t matter at all.
But it does matter. When you have an unhappy relationship weighing you down, it affects everything else in your life. It’s harder to interact with people, because you’re devoting so much energy to a relationship that’s not working. It becomes harder to get things done, because you’re simply out of energy.
Still, it’s important to not make the mistake that a difficult relationship is an unhappy one. Relationships take work, after all. If you’re unhappy because your partner isn’t meeting some ideal relationship that exists only in your head, you may want to consider whether or not you’re being realistic. The relationships where two partners seem to be able to understand and meet each others’ needs without any prompting, didn’t get that way over night. They got that way because the two partners put a great deal of work and communication into that relationship.
Essentially, if you can’t see yourself putting in the work to make the relationship function, then it’s not a good relationship. And in that case, you should feel free to break it off. You’ll be much happier being able to devote your energy to relationships that actually make you happy and leave you satisfied.